When I was a child
I hid in caves
For Dirt soothes with a hand so mild
As to still the beast inside which raves
As a girl enfolded in darkness
I breathed and grew
And smothered my listlessness
And all my food dripped like dew
But the shadows wore on my soul
Which ached for dawn
Not knowing it never shines in Sheol
Born a Sunflower, cut down for a lawn.
While the world tamed my wild
I bucked and learned to fight
So they reviled
But I strove with all my might.
Axes to hew rock
And arms to muscle through
In shadow, my talent I locked.
Never to grow or brew
If a seed must burrow to be a flower
And a rose must have thorns
And a dream finds power
In the death that my souls mourns
Then should I dance on the grave
Of my broken bones?
How? when my lion spirit so raves?
And clouds are to me loaned?
Can I charge heaven an inconvenience fee
For what’s dead inside me?
The talent I must bury
Now groans within, my body’s weary.
The blood I spilled
In order to be filled
Yet still I sit, an empty cup
Oh dear God please fill me up.
New sight for a heart so pained
God was not playing a game
His touch, so gentle, to that I’ll swear
For in Sheol, He found me there.
When He sat next to me
I saw what I never thought to see
Tears and scars and a heavy heart
From the One who created larks.
Then I knew a little more
And Love entered in downpours
Muck and rock washed away
And I lifted to the sky to stay
Yes I died as all seeds do
But just the same grew and grew
But it’s not the talent i hid deep
Which rooted and I bountifully reaped
That washed away all pain and sorrow
And filled me with hope for tomorrow
It’s the Hand I held in the cave
And the God Who Went to the grave
When I understood that then Him I knew
And that’s what made beauty
Worth all the pain I went through.
- A. Faith
